Why?

There’ve been some studies done recently. I’m sure very costly studies at that.

One concluded that fish get seasick. This was determined by sticking an aquarium full of goldfish onto a plane and then sending the plane into a steep nosedive, essentially dropping them out of the sky to simulate weightlessness. Hmm, nope, I don’t think their findings are quite correct. Consider this. People are said to be seasick when floating around the sea while in their natural environment, air. Shouldn’t it follow that fish, in water, on a plane are airsick?

The study goes on to say, and I quote, “The fish lost their sense of balance, they became completely confused and looked as if they were about to vomit.” This brings to mind the question of how many studies have been conducted to determine exactly what fish look like when about to vomit. And then the scientist conducting this invaluable research went onto say that such fish would likely become prey in the sea. As it was the eight fish who became disoriented out of the forty-nine studied were culled to have their brains analyzed in the name of said research. The result? Loss of eye contact with water movement and vibration played a large part in their disorientation. He thinks.

The other study, more poor goldfish, concluded that fish do indeed feel pain and that their reaction to memory of a bad experience was more than just basic reflex.

How’d they do this? Glad you asked. They heated two groups of fish to uncomfortably high temperatures to see if the fish would remember and react the next time heat was introduced. Fish in one group were left as is. Fish in the other were given injections of morphine prior to heating to numb their senses.

Yes, the fish who weren’t drugged remembered they didn’t like being nearly boiled. But what the study didn’t mention was the effect of morphine on fish. Hey, if you’re doing this sort of thing, why not be thorough?

Unfortunately my phone line is dead. I'm at my most wonderful friends' house, begging a bit of computer time. They're so indulgent! The phone company said, due to cutbacks they may or may not have it fixed by Friday. If I'm not back, have a nice life.