Oooookeee

I was at work today and answered the phone as I always do, generally with the wrong greeting for the time of day it actually is. Yeah, I can’t seem to be bothered with that detail. Just not all that important to me to get it right and say good morning in the morning and good afternoon in the afternoon. I get the company name correct and that, to me, is enough. Besides, it tends to throw people off and I like that.

Anyway, I said good afternoon at a little after ten this morning and this man asks who I was. Not unusual so I told him. He then asks me to guess who he is and identified himself as the one who makes me laugh. Um, no, not out of the realm of possibilities on any given day either. But the next question had me suspicious. He wanted to know what shoes I was wearing. Hmm, okay. I asked who he needed to speak to. His response was to tell me to take my shoes off. They were already off but I hung up instead of revealing that to him.

I’ve had prank calls before but I must admit that this one was a first for me. I never had a foot fetish call before. After I stopped laughing I got to thinking. It’s really a little sad that the best thing he has to do on a Wednesday morning is make random calls and chat with women about their feet. What kind of person does that? And guys, do you really get a thrill out of making such calls to someone you don’t know?

Hmm...

I read something today. “It is the superstition of the age that every form of human discomfort is susceptible to the magical powers of hope.” The article I read it in is unimportant. It was about the difference between selling strategies and selling tactics. See? Told you that wasn’t what I was getting at. It was that thought itself that stopped me.

I’m wondering what it means to you. Anyone care to have an opinion today? Keep in mind there is no right or wrong answer here. I thought it was an interesting statement so I shared it with you and now I want to know what you think about it. That’s it. No trick questions.

One Quick Thing

Why are all the directions for brownie mix incorrect? I checked all the boxes last weekend and found that each and every one of them is wrong. They’re all missing something vital and I just don’t understand it.

I couldn’t decide what variety to get which is how I got to looking at all the boxes in the first place. I was going to choose the type that was correct. Didn’t do me one bit of good and my choice dilemma remained.

Oh, you want to know what’s missing. You mean it’s not obvious to anyone but me. You’re messing with me, right? Come on, you all know what I’m talking about. You don’t? For real, I have to point it out to you?

Sigh. How disheartening. Alright. The step that is omitted from every brownie mix that my local store carries is “Add cinnamon to taste.” But you do that just like I do anyway, don’t you?

New Review

I got the yummiest review for Questing from Night Owl Romance. 4.5/5 Hearts! Thank you for naming it a Reviewer's Top Pick, Melinda.

Kiley Fisher is in love. The problem is she has not spoken a word to her love interest. You see Jordan McKade has been in her restaurant for four months just eating…not talking to her. She has fallen in love with his voice. Something about it just makes her all in lust and feeling wild. Yet Kiley knows that it would be crazy to date. Everytime she comes near to talking to him she shakes with nerves. So it comes as a surprise that one night she ends up in his house. Not wanting to leave she is shocked by the deep feelings Jordan has for her. Someone wants her for themselves and she is determined to stay alive. The thing is that the feelings and chemistry Jordan is throwing at her is scaring her. Though they have known each other for around four months she doesn’t really know Jordan McKade. When things start getting tough can she trust Jordan with her heart?

Jordan McKade has found his woman. The thing is that he has not said a word to her. Falling in love from afar is terrible but when he gets a chance to be with her he is nervous as a teenager on his first date. Something about Kiley brings out all the possessiveness in him as well as his passion. Jordan knows it is too soon to show his feelings towards her but he has wanted her since like forever. Kiley is sexy, passionate, and beautiful and the most stubborn woman he has ever known. He knows they belong together but she is weary of risking her heart on a man. Can Jordan convince his Kiley that they belong together for their love is a unique one that only comes once in a lifetime?

Oh my god I loved this book by Barbara Huffert. I really enjoyed this tale as it had a man who already new who his heart belong to…he just had to convince her of the same thing. I loved that Kiley was a shy woman and not sure of what love is, which scares her when Jordan meets her. The fact that he comes everyday is one step of showing her that his love is real and not a joke. You can tell their love for each other right away and it was a great love to read about.

Random Thoughts

I want lemon sponge in a cup. My great aunt has a yummy recipe that she shared with me. I’ve made it. She said it turned out as good as hers but I don’t think so. Hers is much better. I think that has something to do with her making it. I really don’t want to be a little kid again for real but I wouldn’t mind going back in time for a day just to have that. Hmm, while I’m there I’d like to have some of her candied nuts that she used to make at Christmas. And my grandmother’s slicker pie that she always made out of leftover pastry when she was making something else and let me mix together with my fingers. That was fun!

Strawberries are the only fruit with seeds on the outside. Do you think that was on purpose?

I saw a really cool pair of high top sneakers in a magazine. You know. The plain canvas ones like they had when I was a kid. Not the fancy ones like are out there now. Only now the old-fashioned ones cost $62.00. But they’re cute so they’d be worth having. I wish I knew someone with money who likes me. Maybe I could take up a collection from all the people who are annoyed by my multicolored Crocs and buy myself some. Or maybe not since I want the pair that’s four shades of blue mixed together like they sewed them together wrong. I don’t think I’ll mention that. I’ll show them the picture of the bland white ones instead.

Why does my choice of footwear bother some people? I don’t get it. I’m always well-behaved and wear a matched pair. I’ve often been tempted to wear two different colors. Maybe I will just to see how much additional annoyance that causes. They’d probably think I lost my mind, that it wasn’t intentional, and not say a word. Yeah, I might have to test that one.

My squirrels are fat and sassy these days. I think they’ve been eating everything lately instead of stocking up for winter. They seem to have things backwards since they spent the summer burying the nuts I put out. I had someone call me from a block away to tell me she found almonds in her flower pot. Silly squirrels.

I think I’m going out for dinner tonight. I’m not really sure. I was talking to a friend at lunch and it was mentioned and I may have agreed to it but I’m not positive. I can either call and ask which will cause all sorts of amusement or just hang out for a half hour and see if she shows up. Yeah, I think I’ll go with that. Maybe I’ll go change one of my shoes while I wait. She’s one who’d just laugh and shake her head at me. If she doesn’t appear I might wander over to the Pike and see what tonight’s specials are. They always have something yummy. Maybe I’ll call first. It makes Cory the bartender laugh when I call and ask him what’s for dinner. The Phillies lost so it shouldn’t be too packed at this time of night. Sounds like a plan. See ya.

The Saga

T-Mobile

My new best friends. Not. Though they should be after spending so much time speaking to them yesterday. Apparently the troubles I’m having are not related to the total network crash. It’s an intermittent texting issue that, yes, they know about but, no, they haven’t figured out how to eliminate yet. Leave it to me, right?

It started with Tony who said a $20 credit is nice but you’d rather communicate with your friends. Now how would you take that? You’d think it meant you were getting a $20 credit, wouldn’t you? Ha! Silly, silly, silly. Tony said he would troubleshoot me and see what was up. Did he?

Hell if I know. I got kicked back into the hold queue and let me tell you. Their choice of music is intentional torture meant to goad you into hanging up so they don’t have to deal with you. After another 20 minute wait, yeah, I was determined, I ended up with Emily. Poor Emily was the one who informed me of Tony’s little exaggeration on the credit. A service interruption is only worth $5. Did you hear that, anyone with T-Mobile? Call them, listen to horrendous tunes and you’ll get $5 off your next bill. Tell them I sent you. Anyway Emily said I was disconnected from the network. Oh no! She said I should hang up and she’d do her mumbo-jumbo magic to fix it. She promised to call me back within 5, that’s f-i-v-e, minutes. Twenty-four hours later and I’m still waiting. Oh and she did tell me to turn my phone off and back on and then text myself to see if it went through. Yup. BFD! I see no advantage to being able to text me. If I have something to say to me I’ll just say it and not bother with the phone.

Enter Matthew, after my third on-hold torture session. I never knew I was such a masochist but I’m beginning to wonder. Matthew was appalled that neither Tony, not Emily fixed my problem. Why, there was a bright red alert light flashing on my account! Imagine that. I think it’s pretty and they like the way it looks so they wanted it to stay there. He mentioned that my account was showing internal texting was functional, no duh, but external was disconnected. He had me shut off my phone, pushed his big, magic button, turn it back on and viola! It worked. For a few minutes. And then nothing. Again.

Sigh. Blaring noise and hello Tameka. Do you know she actually had the nerve to tell me to have a pleasant evening after saying there was absolutely nothing she could do for me except put me back on hold and pass me on to someone else? I’m not kidding. She really did. Four hours and the fourth person after I started my fruitless quest and she tells me to have a pleasant evening. Sheesh. Nervy of her, wasn’t it?

Another loooooong wait and I end up with Alicia. She’s tech support, not regular customer service. I bemoan my saga yet again and she decides it’s interesting since everything on my account looks just fine. I guess Matthew got rid of the pretty red light. Kind of like tapping over a trouble light on your dashboard I suspect. Alicia went through the same procedure he did, just to make sure and while I was trying to test if it worked she talked to the advanced tech guys who told her to fill out a ticket, see the reason at the top. She returned with a test phone and proceeded to text back and forth a few times with me. Worked with her, not with the friend I’d been trying to talk to. So somewhere out there in T-Mobile headquarters is a phone I can communicate with. Whoopdedoo! Isn’t that special? Yes, I admit it. I was a tad sarcastic with Alicia who, although it was after 10 PM by then, kept her cool and stuck with what she was supposed to say. But really, can you blame me?

Bottom line, the advanced tech guys have 72 hours to address my problem and my life is worth a credit of 50 cents a day for all the time the service is non-functional. I have a ticket number should I decide to subject myself to more of their tunes in order to call and ask about it. Actually Alicia turned out to be okay. She’s giving up her phone for 72 hours along with me so I’m not alone in my isolation. I did, however, allow her one exception and that’s only if she goes into labor since she’s 9 months pregnant. Too bad she won’t be able to let me know too since, unfortunately, MY PHONE DOESN’T WORK!!!

Not the Best Day

T-Mobile is experiencing problems. Problems that started as intermittent texting but became no phone service and no texting. None at all. Zilch. Zip. Nada. Their statement says oops, they’re sorry. That’s just not good enough. My contract is up shortly and I will not be renewing it.

My great aunt, as I’ve mentioned, is 93. She had surgery last week, technically minor, but she is 93. No phone service means I wasn’t able to check on her. When I spoke to her Monday she was a bit mopey. Not good for someone her age who’s just had a procedure. Attitude counts for so much. Silly me dropped long distance on the house phone so I had no way to contact her. And she had no way of knowing why I wasn’t calling, just that I wasn’t. Feeling ignored and abandoned is really not a good thing either.

I tried to call this morning and it rang, major progress, but then it shut off. I don’t know if she was in her room or out at therapy. I really hope she was out so she doesn’t wonder who hung up on her. I’ll try again in a bit and see what happens.

My baby kitty, Kya is off getting spayed today. She has to spend the night. I’ve gotten so used to her curled up on the pillow beside me, purring away, her paw resting on my cheek, that I’m anticipating a long night. Yes, the furry boys are here but they don’t get the whole cuddle keeps away the bad dreams thing. And with my phone acting up, I have no way of reaching out for someone to calm me once the nightmares begin.

And then I got home to find my African violet unpotted all over the living room carpet. Harry had a busy day. Yep, sure it was him because he and Kya are my climbers and she wasn’t home. Somehow, I’m sure T-Mobile is responsible for him doing that today after resisting the temptation for over five years.

I really dislike those people at the moment. Anyone so overjoyed with your phone service you’d recommend them?

Mind Bounce

There’s a new trend beginning which I’m sure all of you will want in on. What is it you ask? Room service tattoos. Yup, that’s right, tattoos done by an in-house ink staff that can be ordered ala carte.

It’s called the Ink & Stay package at the Hotel Erwin in Venice Beach, CA. Deals begin at $399 and include a $100 tattoo voucher, Lubriderm lotion, an ice pack and a bottle of tequila. If, on the off chance, you love it there so much and want the whole world to know, the hotel will give you $500 for sporting an “I Heart Hotel Erwin” tat.

A resurgence you might be interested in is that of drop drinks. Currently popular at the Fire Escape Bar & Grill in Citrus Heights, CA are the classic Reverse Irish Car Bomb, Guinness and Baileys dropped into Jameson which I would probably like, Mexican Sweat, a shot of habanera pepper sauce with a shot of tequila and lime, and the Flaming Jäger Bomb, a shot of burning Jägermeister dropped into a pint of Red Bull. Drop drinks aren’t just for college students anymore!

Did you know November has been rechristened Movember? To raise awareness of prostrate cancer there’s a worldwide movement raising funds for research by sponsoring mustache growth. It’s set up similar to walk-a-thons and has parties and everything. To find out more, go to movember.com

There. How’s that for a bunch of non sequiturs?

Out and About

I went for a walk around my neighborhood last weekend. Not really the safest thing to do but that’s never been a real deterrent to me.

I found a path into the middle of the train yard. Good to know in case the guards won’t let me wander around after I explain to them my purpose for wanting to. I’ll have to wear real shoes though if I end up needing to take the path. Crocs are comfy but not real good when it comes to climbing up and down steep embankments.

Around the corner, a block away, right beside the library branch that’s closing is an awning store. I never noticed it before. What I find interesting is I had come across another awning store earlier in the summer while I was seeking murals. Seemed a bit odd, especially once I tell you I know another local family in the awning business.

Reading really isn’t all that big. Upon consideration, I suppose lots of houses do sport awnings but I never thought there was all that much of a demand for them. I was curious so I checked in the phone book. There are twenty-five awning companies listed. Imagine that. Really, seems like overkill to me but who knows? Perhaps it’s a booming business. Maybe I should learn to thread the sewing machine so I can get in on it. Hmm, no maybe not. I really think be better if I stick to meandering and looking at them instead. Trust me, you don’t want to see anything that I attempted to sew.

Have anything unusual in your neighborhood?

A Tale

Little Callie Winslow was walking home from school today. She was all alone because her best friend, Bitsy who she usually walked with was home sick. Being the good friend she is, Callie had Bitsy’s books with her so she could catch up on her homework. Added to hers, her book bag was very heavy for such a little girl.

When Callie got to the path in the woods they took most days, she hesitated. Everyone always said don’t cut through there alone and Callie never had. No one she knew in her entire eight years of life ever had. It was a bright, sunny day, Indian summer and Callie was tired. She’d been going the long way around all week. But she and Bitsy had walked through the woods together since they’d started school and nothing ever happened. There was nothing scary in the woods so just this once Callie decided she would do it. Who would ever know?

Little Callie Winslow looked around to make sure no one was near. It would be just like the older boys to sneak up behind her and try to scare her if they saw her going into the woods alone. She saw no one so she stepped off the road and started up the path. A few steps into the woods the temperature dropped. Callie thought it had to be the shade since there were still a few leaves on the trees. That had to be why it seemed suddenly darker too.

There hadn’t been any breeze before but now the trees were chattering. Branches clicking, clacking, tapping as if in warning, telling Callie to turn back before it’s too late. Or were they marking her progress, her solitary state, her foolhardy venture? Callie looked to her left, to her right and saw nothing. Everyone was just being silly, telling her not to go into the woods alone. She walked a little further before the rustling started. She didn’t see anything but was sure it had to be the little creatures that always lived in the woods. Bunnies, squirrels, chipmunks, maybe even a skunk although it didn’t smell like a skunk was near.

She kept going. Off to the side there was movement, something scurrying in the underbrush. Callie thought long and hard and realized she and Bitsy had never seen any of the critters she pictured in her mind. Still, it had to be one of them. It just had to be. A crow cawed overhead. Those, she and Bitsy had seen. They’d even talked to one when it hadn’t flown away at their passing. The crow today was louder so Callie looked up and froze. There was more than one and they all seemed to be watching her. And they weren’t at the top of the trees. No, today they were lower, staring at her with their beady black eyes as they called out to each other.

It grew colder still and Callie began to be afraid. She hadn’t gone all that far so she decided maybe she better go back only when she turned around the path was gone. Everything had shifted. Nothing looked familiar. She tried to run the way she’d been going but stumbled. Things that way weren’t the same either. What was happening to the woods? The rustling was coming closer, closer and the crows, oh the crows were making such a ruckus. They were so loud she couldn’t hear the prayers that she’d begun to utter.

Little Callie Winslow went into the woods today and never came out. She was never seen again. And when Bitsy’s books, homework assignments tucked inside, were found at the beginning of the path, no one bothered to keep looking for her. She would not be found but she wasn’t forgotten. Oh no. As those before, when some foolish soul went missing the next generation told their children to remember, remember little Callie Winslow and do not go into the woods alone.