I found this while looking through some old pieces last night. I don't know if I ever shared it or not so here it is.
It’s my fault. It’s always my fault. Everything that has ever gone wrong in the entire history of the world is my fault.
Pretty fucking powerful, aren’t I? Yes indeed, I am. Extremely so and in ways you’ll never understand for it’s not the kind of power anyone would ever want. Not the kind anyone should ever have. No. It’s not something that can be harnessed for good. Hell, it can’t even be harnessed for evil. It’s just there, eating away at me, day after day, year after year with no outlet save one that is inaccessible, no current purpose other than to destroy me.
Amazing that I can still function at all. A weaker individual would have been torn to shreds by now. God, I wish I were weak. I wish this were finished. I wish I didn’t have to do this one more second.
But I do. I will. Until one day, the power welling within me will fill me to overflowing, lightning shooting from my fingertips, the ground melting beneath my feet with every step I take and my head finally explodes. Only I’m afraid that still won’t be the end of it. What if I’m a gremlin at heart and each shard multiplies the power? Exponentially, it would corrupt the world as you know it and then there will be trouble. Oh my yes, trouble with a capital “T” that rhymes with me right here in River City, kiddies.
So do what you can to keep me calm. Appease me however you might because trust me, you don’t want me pissed off. It takes a lot but I’m getting very close to being just that. It’s only at me for now but how quickly that could change. And then it really will be all my fault in the most literal sense.
Hmm, perhaps it’s time. Yes, I think it is. Be afraid. Be very afraid.