I Was Bad!

No, this is not another childhood tale although I suppose it did begin then.  This is me being currently bad.  Shameless you might even say.  I’ve mentioned my great aunt Irva.  I’ve also told you she spent her working life as a sixth grade teacher.  What I haven’t discussed is her uncanny ability to take charge.

In many ways I have always had anthropologist tendencies. Long before I’d ever heard the word and considered majoring in it, I would notice things, observe situations thoroughly and learn from them. 

One of the more fascinating experiences occurred between my great aunt and my mother.  Irva would get this look about her.  Her voice would take on a certain tone.  She would issue an order and my mom would jump and scurry to carry it out.  Oh, Irva was very polite and extremely sweet while making demands and waiting regally for my mom to accomplish her task but they were commands all the same.  It truly was beautiful to behold and I can picture it being just as effective throughout her 40 plus year teaching career.

Yesterday, I decided I wanted something that has been rotting away in my mother’s house, neglected and barely remembered since I was a child.  The only time it’s been mentioned at all was when she would consider disposing of it.  Not really the outcome I wanted for this so I mustered my best General Irva demeanor last night and called my mother.  I told her, very Irva-esquely what I wanted. 

I was informed it was not in the attic as I’d thought but in an outbuilding.  Hmm.  Not as hot out there but it would still take some doing to retrieve it.  Oh I know what you’re thinking.  Why don’t I just go and get it myself?  Well I could.  But I don’t want to.  I am providing her a service, removing said item from her life.  If I went and dug it out it wouldn’t be an even exchange.  And I’d already magically transformed myself into my great aunt so there was no backing down.  It would ruin everything and perhaps not be useful in future dealings with my mother.

So we hung up, her stating by all means, she would indeed unearth the treasure I am after.  Today, in fact.  And then Saturday, I will go and easily claim it from her porch, eliminating the need for her to determine how to dispose of it.  Fair all the way around, right?