I Need Dirt!

It’s Spring. Time to be digging around and growing things.

The problem is that my yard has been overrun by damn strawberries. Yes, I know. Stop complaining. I’ll have 4-6 weeks of fresh fruit, totally organic, which is free. I should be celebrating.

But I’m not. I need to plant things and there’s not an inch of space left. I’ve already dug around, getting the garden in the courtyard at work ready to plant so for now, there’s nothing left to do there. I even planted a few pansies so I have something pretty to look out at and watch grow.

I need more! I’m about the most disorganized gardener you’ll find. When it comes to flowers, I like chaos. Riots of color, mismatched plants, things that shouldn’t grow where I stick them. I’ve learned, over the years, to ask the yard spirits to watch over whatever I plant and not to yank out things that are already growing happily, even if they aren’t where I want them. Leaving things be seems to make the yard spirits happy and then they help with the rest of the plants. Thus the out of control strawberries in my yard. I’ve asked the spirits for space to plant other things too but for now, they want strawberries.

Which leaves me roaming around, looking for space I can claim. Anyone need help in your yard? I’ll be right over!

See?

I wasn’t kidding. Since I had my camera with me the other day I thought I’d show you just how creepy the cornfield next to where I grew up truly is.

This is it in its dormant state. The only time it’s less weird feeling is when it’s completely enshrouded in snow. Still, it was plenty bad enough.

Soon, the farmer that rents the field will be plowing this under and sowing new corn, another layer of creepiness added to all the rest.

Perhaps I’ll come back and get you a photo of it in all its green eeriness. But only up until it’s waist-high. Once it passes that there’s no way I’m going anywhere near it until after it’s harvested.

There are many, many, many ways to end a life but mine will not cease due to the corn. Not this field anyway.

Look At Me

Standing in the moonlight
In all my glory
My alabaster skin glowing
Hips swaying gently
To a melody on the wind
That only I can hear
Fingers delving
Touching secret spots
Concealed in shadow
Dreamed of
Yearned for
Hands moving
Cupping curved softness
Arms raise slowly
Twining overhead
Reaching
Stretching
Whole body undulating
In a dance as old as time
Curls flowing
Fluffed by the breeze
That carries the scent
Of my sweetness
Lips glistening
Parted
Waiting to be kissed
Clouds play over the moon
Hiding me from view
Am I here?
Or am I gone?
Bored by your indecision
The sky clears
The world pauses
Captivated by my sudden stillness
My eyes pierce your soul
Pinning you
Yes, I knew you were there, watching
Look at me
I am a Goddess
Are you worthy?

Enquiring Minds

The wonderful and talented Molly Daniels interviewed me today. Stop by and say hello.

So...

I was nice. I took the mommy to the grocery store. No, not on rollerblades. I tossed her out and picked her up at the door which saved her hiking across the parking lot twice. I know why she wouldn’t send me with a list. She bought all sorts of things that I wouldn’t have. Twinkies. Ew. Yeah, I know. I don’t have to eat them so what’s the big deal? Doesn’t matter. She reads ingredients on everything else, worrying about chemical content and then buys Twinkies.

I made a rather interesting discovery while at the store. Weis Kings in Oley. Yes, you need to know that because of what I’m about to tell you. Since I was there and not permitted to comment on her selections, I wandered and looked around. Guess what they sell in the frozen food section. Bet you can’t. Are you ready?

Handcuffs. Metal ones. Really, they do! As I said, in with frozen foods. Of course. Where else would you put them? While the mommy was checking out I simply had to ask. The baby boy cashier’s explanation – The snow people who live in the freezer come out at night and use them while playing cops and robbers.

Speaking of living in freezers, the weather today is doing a damn good impersonation of summer. What’s the opposite of a sauna? Whatever it is I need one. No, two. One at home and one at work. Hey, here’s an idea. I’ll build a portable one, pretty wood like saunas only with metal benches to relax on, and tow it around behind Howie. Then, whenever my head starts to hurt, I can crawl inside until I’m cold enough for it to stop.

I hate summer! Well, except for the pretty flowers. And all the local fruit and veggies. Hmm, maybe instead of a room I need some sort of suit. But not bulky, like a space suit. Just something to keep me cold instead of warm. Forget saunas, what’s the opposite of neoprene?

If One Must Be Blue...

Kya Says...

Happy Weekend!

Karma

When I was a small child, pre-kindergarten, I had a plastic turtle. Not only could I pull it around by its reigns, but I could also ride it. And when it was bounced on, it shot ping pong balls out of its mouth.

At the time, my mother belonged to the Junior Women’s Club. They were holding a White Elephant sale and she, for reasons she has yet to explain, decided my most beloved toy of all time, my turtle, should be donated to it. As you might imagine this caused major amounts of heartache and hysteria on my part. So much that my father, who very rarely countermanded her decrees, attempted to locate and reclaim my turtle after the sale, as it hadn’t sold. Unfortunately, it had already moved on to wherever things went. The small child in me has never forgiven her for this.

Last week, my mother phoned and mentioned that she’s undergoing a tremendous amount of trouble with her back, was in extreme pain and could barely walk. She’s been having all sorts of tests, none of which show anything.

We spoke again last night. Nope, they haven’t figured it out yet. She informed me she had to go to the grocery store and was moaning about how much it was going to hurt. I offered to go for her but no, that wouldn’t do. I don’t know what she needs and she was opposed to making a very detailed list.

So here’s my solution. Since she can stand without being in too much pain, I am going to shove my rollerblades on her feet and fashion a harness with which I will tow her around the store like an overgrown pull toy. I will then stuff her mouth full of ping pong balls and when we get to something she wants added to the cart, she can spit one at it.

The moral – never, ever get rid of your child’s favorite toy because if you do, the universal powers that be will sooner or later do something to even things out.

I Can't Breathe!

Well, I can but only when I don’t think about it.

This morning I was involved with something where out of the blue, the person presiding wanted to focus us so she told us to close our eyes. Okay, no problem. And then she told us to take a deep breath. Hold it. Release. Um, no can do. Un uh. No way.

This set of instructions was repeated two additional times. By the third, I had my nails dug into the palm of my hand. Not only does being told when to breathe freak me out but listening to other people as they do does too.

Yeah, I know. I’m a tad odd. Breathing and cornfields. I’m sure there must be some sort of logical connection between them but I have yet to figure it out. Most likely I’ll be sitting in one of these meetings and have and “ah ha” moment and it’ll all be suddenly clear.

Until then, don’t be surprised when I ignore such tasks and passively refuse to participate in such exercises. I’m not being difficult. I honestly can’t force myself to do it.

Can You Help?

Restless prowling
Overwhelming discontent
I must change, am changing into…
…into…
I don’t know.

But I know what I’ve been – nothing
Only now that the transformation has begun
I’m fit to burst with…
…with…
I don’t know.

Is it madness that possesses my mind
Pure insanity
Making me so ready to…
…to…
I don’t know.

Or something else
Something more
Something that…
…that…
I don’t know.

Things used to be so clear
I was me and that was that
But now…
…now…
I don’t know.

Who I am
What to do
Where to go
I just…
…just…
I don’t know.

Happy Birthday!

Tomorrow is Beau’s birthday. Hard to believe he’s only been around a year. He’s such a wise old soul sometimes. And at others, he’s still all kitten. Just ask the big cats.

We are, of course, having the celebratory birthday tuna for dinner. Then the big cats have a stash of toys for Beau. I think they’re hoping that he will then leave the toys they already have for them to play with. Not very likely. He has obviously decided that all toys are his, whether they’re old or new.

I got him his very own notebook which he’s already started using. He was there when I brought the bag in and when he found it he knew it was for him so I didn’t make him wait until tomorrow to open it. He’s written his first story, Hands On. It’s a creepy little tale and I’m so proud of him. Maybe, if you ask nicely, wish him a happy birthday, and send your email addy, he’ll let you read it.

It's Alive!

A year or so ago, a Monkey King statue came to live with me. It’s made of blue frosted glass and has been in the same location since it arrived.

Last night, I flipped off the lights and was headed to bed when I noticed I could see blue coming from that corner of the living room. I shouldn’t have been able to see anything. It was dark. Something was different. That’s when I realized. The statue was glowing.

It’s never done that before. And I have no idea why it did so last night. But glowing it was. I was up in the night, prowling as I do at times. I checked and yep, it was still glowing.

Although it’s odd, it’s not at all frightening. I suspect the magic of the statue is reawakening. It’s decided that it’s safe where it is and I can be trusted not to interfere with whatever its purpose is. I can’t wait to find out what that might be!

Curiouser and Curiouser

There’s a man who sits in his SUV across from where I work. All day. Every day. It’s not a fancy SUV, nor is it particularly ratty. It’s average looking. Just like the man himself. Both are always there, a constant in the neighborhood, something seen without really being noticed.

Today however, one of my coworkers pointed him out and we talked about him. Again, he’s always there. She’s seen him coming out of a building across the street in the morning. Her theory is that he lives there, is unemployed and sits in the car to save his parking space without having to put money in the meter. Our block is the last with meters so he could move a block away and not have to worry about it. She thinks he won’t do that because something happened in the past and he’s concerned about the safety of his vehicle when it’s out of sight.

My thought is that he is just staying with someone who lives across the street and isn’t trusted enough to remain inside alone after the individual goes to work. He’s unemployed and can’t really afford gas to drive anywhere though not totally destitute since he has Dunkin Donuts cups on the dash. He spends his days reading in the front seat with his book propped against the steering wheel or reclining in the back. There’s always music playing and it’s a wonder that his battery hasn’t gone dead.

Another idea was that he conducts business out of the SUV but no one ever stops to speak with him so that pretty much rules that out. Or he could be from some agency and sitting there is his undercover assignment. Hmm. He doesn’t look all that threatening. Perhaps I’ll stop by tomorrow and ask if I can interview him.

What Did They Say?

I was scooting along on my way to work this morning, listening to a local morning show when the news came on. There are only three or four minutes allotted for local news and they try to cram in as much as possible.

One of today’s stories concerned the ongoing tussle between the city and the water authority over rate hikes and money needed as part of the Act 47 financing deal. There was already a 12% increase in water but they’ve been arguing over a sewer usage hike. The water authority said no. The city said yes. Today’s news stated that the water authority has given in to a matching increase in sewer fees because doing anything else would require a complex formula that would take too much time. Huh? Did I hear that correctly? I listened again in half an hour and yes, I did. Um, okay. So no one knows a seventh graders who takes beginning algebra who could help with that?

Then I read the newspaper. Their version is slightly different as they gave it marginally more attention than the radio news had time for. According to the article there, it’s the city having trouble with the formula. They’re the one who actually process the bills. The city managing director said that currently sewer rates are calculated at 161% of water consumption. If they raise water by 12%, the complex formula to keep the sewer fee at its non-12% increased fee would make the bills take twice as long to calculate. Apparently he doesn’t know any seventh graders either.

This made me curious. Just how hard was it to come up with a formula that could raise water rates without significantly changing the sewer portion of a bill? I haven’t had algebra in almost 30 years so admittedly I’m a little slow. It took me four minutes, including testing, to come up with something that could be applied across a broad spectrum. That’s the entire length of the radio stations news broadcasts. And, in case you’re wondering, it is not anywhere near anything resembling a complex formula that would cause even the slowest of computers to double its calculation time.

If anyone in the city government is interested, I’d be happy to share it with them. But I’m sure they’re not. That would mean they wouldn’t get the extra revenue their idiocy is going to bring in.

I Can Read!

As I mentioned before, I’ve been having some trouble getting my mind to concentrate enough for me to read. A few weeks ago, I was going to clean off the chest inside my front door. I got as far as picking up the first book on the top of the pile. When I flipped it over, it sounded interesting.

So I abandoned my cleaning project and began to read. And then I spent the entire weekend reading, including reading a little bit before I got out of bed in the morning. I haven’t done that in years! The book was huge, 600+ pages and I’ve already finished it. Now I’m halfway through the sequel and loving it just as much.

I don’t know what happened to inhibit my ability to read. I’ll probably never know. Nor do I know what exactly about these books unlocked that magic again but I will be eternally grateful to Patrick Rothfuss for writing The Name of the Wind and The Wise Man’s Fear. I’m so excited for the third book of the Kingkiller Chronicles trilogy to come out. I can’t wait!

This is a feeling that’s been severely lacking in my life lately and I’m so happy to have it back. You just can’t imagine.

Beautiful!

I went to see the Little One in her school’s musical Saturday. The show itself wasn’t one I’d choose, especially for a public school, but it did show off their talent very nicely. The kids did a great job.

The big surprise came about halfway through the first act. The Little One had a solo! Now she had mentioned this in passing. Months ago at the very beginning of rehearsals. So long ago that my feeble old brain forgot. How wonderful it was! I’m so proud of her!

She’s always, as her mom put it, had stage presence. No matter what the show is or what role she has, the Little One throws herself into it wholeheartedly. She’s tremendous to watch, very vibrant and alive. You can tell how much fun she’s having and this play was no exception.

Some people hear “School Show” and think “Ugh, going out of obligation.” Not me. Not when one of my little girls is involved. I gladly attend and am honored that she wants me there.

Releasing Friday!

As in tomorrow!

Condemned

Book 3 of the Cosmic Connections series


Blurb:

Brett Hudson’s life is in shambles. An attempt to deny fate has left him wide open for an unscrupulous pair intent on ruining him completely.

Andrea Sloan knows she and Brett are meant to be together the instant they meet. It takes a while, but finally chance puts her in the right place at the right time to rescue him, then a night of intense sex only complicates things even more.

Now Brett must salvage what’s left of his life and prove himself worthy of Andie’s love before it’s too late. A little BDSM sex play might be the answer…

Excerpt:

After dinner, Brett walked Tish out to the gatehouse. Jesse and Andie followed, only to find they were unable to resist the hammock they spied in the yard. They settled in together and were talking comfortably.

When Jesse heard the door, he said, “Pretend you’re sleeping. Stay limp.” Softly, he whistled to get Brett’s attention. “I need your help,” he whispered as Brett approached.

“What can I do for you?” Brett asked frowning at the thought that something was wrong with Andie.

“We were only going to relax here for a minute but Andie’s out cold. I’m afraid if I try to crawl out, I’ll end up dumping her on the ground. Do you think you can lift her off me?” Jesse controlled his reaction when Andie poked his side where Brett wouldn’t see her. Apparently, she didn’t like his idea.

“Yeah, sure.” Brett gulped.

As soon as Brett scooped her into his arms, Jordan appeared. “Jesse, I hate to interrupt, but can I have a minute? I’m sure Brett doesn’t mind taking her in and getting her settled.”

“No problem,” Brett answered when Jesse looked at him.

Inwardly, he groaned. When he had picked Andie up, she snuggled into his arms. She mumbled something on the stairs, so he said, “It’s okay, Andie. I have you. I won’t let you fall.”

“Mm.” She shifted against him, nuzzling his chest.

“Here you are,” Brett said as he pulled down the covers and put her in the bed. “Let me get your shoes.”

Andie acted like she was still mostly asleep. “Wait,” she muttered, reaching under her shirt and unhooking her bra. Brett watched while she slid it off without removing her shirt in the way that only women could do. “Jeans,” she said as she lay back on the pillow and held out her bra.

“Ah, yeah, okay.” Brett took a deep breath and reached for the button. After he slid the zipper down, he told her to lift her hips. As he removed her jeans, he couldn’t help noticing that her panties were the same sheer material that her bra was. When he realized that he was ogling his friend’s girlfriend, he forced himself to look away. He finally managed but not before his gaze lingered on the hardened nipples that were clearly visible beneath her snug shirt. With great effort, he pulled the blanket over her body. Unable to resist, he leaned over and kissed her lightly. “Night, Andie. Sleep well.”

Andie snuggled deeper into the covers before she answered. “You too, Brett. Thanks.”

Brett closed the door to Andie’s room softly behind him. What the hell was he doing? He decided he must be even more stressed out than he thought to have just acted that way with Jesse’s woman. He should have pretended he hadn’t heard her when she told him to wait. He was as bad as a peeping tom! She was asleep and didn’t deserve to have him ogling at her like some kind of pervert. Thank God she didn’t know what he was thinking. And, to make matters worse, he’d kissed her! What possessed him to do something so stupid? She was off-limits. No exceptions. Sleeping or not, it didn’t make any difference. But damn if she hadn’t looked sexy, lying there, in nothing but her panties and shirt.

Today's Trivia

The term “rain check” is thought to have originated back in the 1880’s in reference to tickets issued to a future baseball game when that day’s game had to be called on account of rain. In 1889, Abner Powell created a detachable ticket stub to be used on such occasions. Prior to that, a whole new ticked was given. In 1890, the whole process was formalized when the National League included the practice in their official constitution.

Over the years, the use of rain checks has expanded to other areas. It has become an assurance to customers that an out of stock sale item can be purchased at a future date for the sale price.

Rain check is also used informally as a postponement, or declination, of an invitation, a sort of promise that an event will occur at a future date. “No dinner tonight but I’ll take a rain check for next week.”

Rambling

“Only three people were shot in Reading on Sunday.” Yep, that really is how one radio station reported it. Only three people were shot in what is being considered as two unrelated incidents. Well isn’t that just ducky? Only three people. They make it sound like LOTS of people are shot in Reading all the time. There is a lot of shooting. And there are people shot fairly often. But not nearly as often as gunfire is heard. So it’s not really as bad as that one report implied.

It seems the people shooting in my neighborhood are using their weapons more as noisemakers than to do bodily harm. Either that or they’re really, really bad shots since there have been fewer people injured in my immediate vicinity than years past. Or perhaps they’re hunting rats, though I doubt it due to the lack of rat carcasses lying around.

Moving on…

I heard today that indicators show that gas prices aren’t expected to drop anytime soon. And that the cost of a gallon of gas has been inching up over the last several weeks. Um, no. It went up six cents last Friday alone. When I left on my little journey gas was $3.62/ga. When I hopped back on the turnpike to return home the price was $3.68/ga. Sorry, but I don’t consider that “inching up”. I don’t see how they can possibly justify that much of a jump in just a few hours.

I suppose I don’t grasp the whole gas pricing process. It seems to have the ability to change at any given moment. Does that mean the refineries are purchasing oil every minute of every day, around the clock? And processing it instantly? Yeah, I don’t understand how this one works at all.

Beau’s been telling me stories. Pretty cool, having a magical kitty who can do that. The only trouble is he tells me everything except the first lines. That makes it a little difficult for me to write them down for him. I keep explaining that the opening lines are essential but he’s still a baby and doesn’t seem to get that yet. Sigh. We’ll keep working on it because his tales are very wicked and definitely worth sharing.

Catching Up

Hmm, let’s see. What have I been up to these past few days?

Friday, in the snow, I took a little ten hour drive across the state and back for a quick visit with some very good friends who I’ve been missing lately. Considering the circumstances, it ended up being a wonderful day.

When I got home in the wee hours of the morning I found that Condemned is back on the Coming Soon page, complete with new cover. Such a fun thing, seeing my very own book there!

Saturday, I went to the Middle Child’s engagement party. They’re both such great kids. Between them, the others in their family, and their friends I’m not so worried about the future of the world. It’s in good hands. Friends, fun, way too much yummy food to choose from. What more could you ask for?

Sunday, I curled up with the kitties and read more of the book that distracted me from getting anything accomplished on my cleaning project the weekend before. Wait. That’s not quite true. I did move one book, the one I’m now reading, off the pile. Better than nothing, right?

How was your weekend?