Wednesday, January 27, 2010

I Get It

I think I may have finally figured something out today. Took me far too long but fortunately a brick wall didn’t need to fall on me for me to get this. Whew since I seriously suspect that would have been next. The subtle clues the universe has been handing me haven't been sinking in so it was probably gearing up to do something blatant.

You see, I‘ve been saying forever that I want to have a nice day. That’s it. A nice day. Not often. Just one every now and then. And not spectacular. I know that’s asking for far too much. Nice, average with nothing going wrong is all I’m looking for at this point but for years that’s been expecting the extreme.

My big revelation today is why that is. Do you know? No? All right, I’ll tell you. Things go wrong constantly because this is not what I’m meant to be doing. I’m in the wrong place doing the wrong thing. That’s why nothing works. Fate keeps throwing roadblocks in my path to get me to change directions to show me that this is simply not my destiny. And no matter how hard I struggle to make a go of this particular set of circumstances I am never going to fit.

But that doesn’t mean I should just lie down and give up. Nope. It means I have to switch tracks and seek my bliss elsewhere. Ah, that’s the tricky part. If I knew what exactly that was and where it would lead I’d already be there doing it. No, I really don’t have a clue but I’ll come up with it somehow. I have to. I don’t know how much longer I’ll survive this holding pattern I’m in.

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