Woohoo, It's Tuesday!

Don’t let that innocent little sleepy face fool you. Beau may be getting bigger but he’s still pure kitten. He discovered the joys of making things go splash and is slowly working his way through all the toys to see which has the best result. I’ve taken away all the mechanized ones for now just in case because I really don’t want him to electrocute himself. Funny how the big cats all come and stare at me until I remove whatever he’s deposited in the water bowl when they did the same thing in the past. I should probably be grateful that Beau hasn’t taken to dropping the wet toys on my face while I’m sleeping like Taz used to.

There’s a volcano erupting in North Sumatra. It’s been dormant for over 400 years and took scientists by surprise. Huh? I thought they monitored this sort of stuff worldwide. People living on the slopes started to flee over the weekend when it began to rumble. It exploded Sunday and again on Monday. That area of Indonesian now on the highest alert level. Ya think?

I was talking with a friend yesterday and we concluded I might be just a tad bit odd. Now I know you have trouble accepting that but trust me, it’s true. Why? Because I can’t breathe if I think about it. If it goes on too long I get panicky and eventually hyperventilate. As you might guess I have lots of trouble with those tests where I’m told to hold my breath. That’s something I can only do when I decide to, not when I’m instructed to.

Johnson & Johnson is recalling hip replacement products. Hmm, okay so how exactly does this work? Do they sneak into your house while you’re sleeping and just yank it out? The article I read was very vague about it. The items were manufactured by DePuy Orthopaedics so if you have one you may want to check further into this. And if you do, please let us know what happens.

I want a mini computer. No, I have absolutely no legitimate need for one. I simply want it. So if you’re feeling generous and want to surprise me please, feel free. Um, I’d prefer one with an internet card and oh yeah, if you could, can you prepay a two year plan for access for that to go with it? Thanks, I’d really appreciate it.

One Day Soon

Mired in a world of so-called normalcy
Surrounded by humans
I bide my time
Waiting to make my escape
To join the others
Ice cold sweat dries between my breasts
The heat of their world sickens me
Harder and harder with each passing day to keep my mask in place
It starts to slip when I hear their sniveling
Weak and whiny over trivialities
So unworthy of survival
Give me my blades
And loose my true nature for ten minutes
I could fix all
The slaughter would be magnificent
Oh, the feast my kind would make of their bloody flesh!
What a glorious occasion it would be
Alas, there will be no culling on this day
For it would bring notice to the presently unaware
Igniting their wrath, piteous though it would be
And we would become the Hunted
Too, too soon
No, I must resist temptation until I can slip quietly away
No matter how I wish otherwise
For they are truly undeserving
But I rest easy
Their reprieve is merely temporary
The time will come
We will return
And no one will be spared

Home

Staring at nothing
Where dreams once danced through my mind
So many it overflowed
Sending sparks of what would be skittering across the sky
Like tiny kites sporting previews
Visions of what was coming
One look in my eyes and you knew I was a force to be reckoned with
But the winds changed
Storms crushed instead of fueled
Funnels sucked the hope from my essence
I lost all faith
In me
The clouds opened up and wept for the loss of my spirit
No became acceptable
Failure
Waste
Loser
The only names I heard
I was gone
Buried so deep it should have been forever
Then, in a swirl of burnished autumn leaves, you blew into my life
Glowing bright
Like a shining star guiding me back
You breathed new life into me
Rekindling my magic
Calling out to my soul
Showing me I was still me
Dormant, not dead
You reawakened me
And now that you have
I belong to you
My life is yours
I know no fear for with certainty you treasure it
Holding me close to your heart
Yet without a doubt you will open your hand and set me free
Tossing me into the breeze
To watch me soar
Secure that no matter how high or how far I go I will always return to you
For in you I have found my only true home

Assorted Stuff

After three years, I finally finished up watching the complete MacGyver series. It’s so sad. Not only am I going to miss the creativity, I’m going to have to choose what to watch next. Now you may not realize it, but doing that is not an easy thing for me. Sigh.

Did you know there’s a British Egg Information Service? Yeah, me either. They claim that the half-billion egg recall could have been easily prevented had the flocks been vaccinated to prevent the chickens from contracting salmonella. Apparently British hens receive inoculations which limit their salmonella outbreaks to about 1% of all poultry as opposed to 60-70% on untreated fowl. The vaccine has been available here since 1992 but it is not required. Gotta wonder about that one, don’t you?

Have you seen he traffic jam in China? It’s reported to be 60 miles long with people already stranded for two weeks. They estimate it may last another three. Weeks. As in people might spend up to five weeks living in their cars with no way out. And vendors providing supplies at exorbitant prices. They claim there are no reports of violent road rage but I’m not sure I believe that one. I would have serious problems if I were suddenly stuck sitting on a bright, sunny road for a month. Especially since I rarely have any cash to speak of with me. I really think I’d do better trapped in the mine. I also don’t understand how they let it get that bad since it was triggered by planned road construction and not some major fluky accident.

My day didn’t start out particularly well today. About three hours into it, I happened to glance out into the courtyard by my office and saw a hummingbird hovering nearby. How awesome is that? In the space of five seconds everything turned around and my day was significantly improved. Don’t you love when that sort of thing happens?

Ooh, Now I've Done It!

There’s a woman at work who is having lap band surgery on Monday. In an attempt to be morally supportive I said I’d join her by restricting myself to her diet for the first six weeks. I detoxify myself on occasion anyway since I consume far too much processed sugar so it shouldn’t be that big of a deal. Right?

Wrong! I was reading over the paperwork at lunch today and let me tell you. This is gonna suck. The next four pre-surgery days are clear liquids, no sugar, no caffeine. After surgery it’s two days of clear liquids, no sugar, no caffeine, no calories. She’s going to be fine with that. She’ll have had surgery and not want anything. I, on the other hand, am going to be starving!

There’s two weeks of clear liquids, then two weeks of plain liquids as in strained cream soups or gruel, and then two weeks of extremely soft stuff such as stage 1 or 2 baby foods. Yeah. What was I thinking?

Oh well, I said I’d do it and I will. It certainly won’t hurt me. And who knows? By the time this six weeks is up I might be prepared for Plan E – becoming a stripper. Hmm, perhaps not.

Choices

I cried myself to sleep and began to dream
I was standing at a crossroads
Which path do I take?
I closed my eyes and asked the wind for guidance
But there was no breeze
I was on my own
One path, twisted and turned, steep and treacherous
Following the thread of my illusive dreams
Attainable only if I could negotiate the rough terrain that might well kill me
The other, straight and narrow
A direct route to the gray nothingness of politically correct acceptability
Safe even as it would drain the joy from my very being
Which do I choose?
Uncertainty?
Possible failure and the crushing death that would bring
The same path which also holds the chance to have it all
Or conformity?
A slow and steady decay of my soul until I may as well be dead
I stood, looking from one to the others
Hesitant to throw away my dreams
Hesitant to hold on to them
I dreamed I was at a crossroads
And then I cried myself awake

Plans

To see if you have money that you’ve forgotten about, go to http://www.missingmoney.com/ or http://www.unclaimed.org/. Check each state where you’ve lived and all names you’ve ever gone by. Yeah, tried that as Plan B and no, as expected I haven’t misplaced any cash. On to Plan C. Anyone want to adopt me? Nah, didn’t think so but hey, it never hurts to ask.

Did you see in the news about the 33 miners who are stuck deep within a Chilean gold and copper mine? They are 2257 feet below the surface and miraculous still alive since being trapped on August 5th. There is a six-inch wide hole that is all that is linking them to survival at this point. According to reports, drilling and shoring up a hole big enough for them to escape will take up to four months. In the meantime, food, water, medical supplies and communication devices will continually be passed to the miners through the small hole. The capsules take an hour to lower and, until they coat the walls of the hole to decrease the risk of additional rock falls, there is always the possibility of the hole collapsing in on itself.

Supposedly the health risks are relatively small in copper and gold mines, unlike coal mines. As long as there is air and a way to supply food and water they should be fine. If they don’t lose their minds that is. Which is why the mine owners have assembled a team of psychiatric experts to implement a plan to maintain the miners’ sanity to go along with their physical well-being.

Um, yeah. I’m not at all claustrophobic, as long as I can move, but still, I don’t think I’d do very well being trapped underground for that length of time. Guess that means I’ll scratch becoming a miner off my list of Plan D’s.

For Eternity

Amid the unrelenting chaos
I stand, stock still
The world, a whirling dervish around me
Yet I remain untouched, unaffected
Others whipped hither and yon
Pulled this way and that
Tossed, turned, trundled about, their norm
I am stationary
Unscathed
For there is nothing left within
I died eons ago
Now just an empty shell
Motionless in the bedlam
Scavengers have tried to claim it
Only to be scared off by the eerie echoes that emanate from what once was my soul
Truth
Be warned
Appearances are deceiving
The zen you think you see is false
Look closely if you dare
But risk the burn of frostbite
From straying too near my frigid corpse
Back away instead
Leave me to my sentence
To endlessly wander the frozen tundra of life in total isolation

Well...

The lottery option didn't pan out.

On to plan B.

Um, would anyone happen to know what plan B is? If so please give me a call 'cause frankly, I'm at a bit of a loss here.

Why does everything always have to be so difficult?

Howie's Sad

He needs a new catalytic converter.

They're damn expensive.

I'm sad too.

It gets installed Friday. I stopped on my way home and bought a lottery ticket so I can pay for it. Send out good vibes for us winning enough to cover the cost please.

Thanks. Howie and I really appreciate it.

Lounging

I took the last few days off.

Thursday, because it was my birthday. Ha! Didn’t know that, did you? Don’t worry. I didn’t tell anyone else either. It was necessary to be off because it’s just so wrong to work on your birthday, even if no one knows about it.

Friday I needed to be off because I went to hang out with some out of town friends. One knew I was coming, one I surprised. Big fun!

I took off Monday simply because I wanted to. Oh I had some errands that needed doing but I could have accomplished them Saturday had I felt like it. I didn’t so I skipped them, since I had Monday to take care of everything.

I was back to work today and wow, was it hard! It’s so easy to get out of work-mode and so difficult to get back into it. But the cats and I have a fondness for eating so I suppose I’ll have to manage.

Sigh.

Resurrection

Staring into the abyss
Shadows leeching me
Draining me into the void until I know not who I am
My past, gone but no tragedy
Nothing in it worth the struggle to retain
My future, already blank so inconsequential
All that’s left is now
Me
Now
I wait for some glimmer
Some sense of who I was
But I’ve been wiped clean
As I think is expected, I mourn the loss of me
even as I celebrate my resurrection
I am born anew
And this time I will be magnificent
I stand with the mists of time and space swirling around me
Through me
Morphing me
Molding me
Into something new
Different
Unique
Not quite human
I collect strength
Gathering power
Letting it build until I feel myself forming
My new soul is as old as history
And deep in my marrow I possess the secrets of the universe
I grasp control
Taking over my recreation
Adding a dose of darkness
Of elemental evil
To guard against those who would turn me back into nothing as they had before
It will not happen again
Never
I am prepared
And you have been warned

See Ya

Too dang hot for me this week so I'm taking a few days off. I'll be back soon, hopefully done with the heat grumpies. I swear this is the worst summer I remember. With any luck it'll be the worst of my lifetime and I'm planning on living a long, long time.

Happy weekend! (Yep, taking the next few days off from work too. Ha!)

Ooh, Pretty

I went out in my yard over the weekend. Yeah, I know but really, I did.

I have some bulbs that send up leaves in the spring. They die off and I forget all about them being there. Then, in the fall, flower stalks magically appear. Nothing showing one minute, two foot tall bursts of blossoms the next. It’s so cool when to peer out and have them suddenly there where nothing had been the day before.

Unbelievably, my yard thinks fall is on the way. I have flowers! Aren’t they pretty? My grape hyacinths are sending up their fall foliage too so I suppose the weather really is going to change one day soonish. Having a hard time believing that but plants know these things and who am I to argue?

Exit, Stage Left

I walked out of the wings of my tortured solitude
And in to the sanctuary of your embrace.
For the only time in my run
I found pure acceptance,
True friendship,
Absolute safety.
New scripts, all.
For a moment, I thrived.
The play that was my life, not a tragedy.
I was lauded,
Encored.
I glimpsed happiness.
But the curtain fell
With me on the wrong side.
My command performance, ended.
And all that’s left is
Me.
Center stage.
Staring into emptiness.

An Unexpected Treat

I had to make a stop on my way home from work today. I absolutely hate doing that. When I’m done I want to put on comfy clothes and relax, not run around in the world, especially when it’s nearly 100 and super muggy outside.

But today’s errand turned out to be good. I bumped into an old friend and we ended up having a quick dinner together. I’ve known her for over 20 years. We used to work together. That company is now closed down so we’re both doing other things but she’s one of the very few people I stay in touch with. (Translation – one of the few people my penchant for solitude hasn’t chased off.)

Anyway we went to Schell’s, a place that’s been around since before we were kids. They specialize in hotdogs with barbecue on top and they’re just as good now as they’ve always been. I bet it’s been at least ten years since I was there last and they really haven’t changed all that much. The only thing missing is deep fried green pepper rings which I used to love but I suppose it’s okay if that’s the only difference. I’d heard they never were all that popular, something I never understood.

We sat and chatted, catching up on all that’s going on with both of us and made a date to have a go at Schell’s miniature golf course as soon as the weather breaks. I even agreed to appear at a cookout at her place in the fall. Okay so I’ve been agreeing to that one the entire time we’ve known each other and still haven’t made it but she adores me anyway. Why, I have no clue. And who knows. Perhaps this years I’ll actually make it there.

Did You Know?

There’s a disease called white nose syndrome that’s impacting multiple species of bats and is very likely to endanger even the most common variety. Simplified, the disease causes a white fungus to grow on the noses of infected bats during hibernation which depletes fat reserves and immune responses causing bats to die. In severe cases it also grows on wings, ears, and tails. Most bats die in the winter, some in the summer when infected and weakened too much to recover.

Bat species account for nearly one quarter of all mammals world-wide. There are 45 native to North America. The six in Pennsylvania are all infected to some extent already. White nose syndrome seems to affect all varieties of bats indiscriminately and has been found in 13 states as well as two Canadian provinces. To date, the cause is unknown as is the cure.

Each bat eats between 2000 and 6000 insects nightly so the potential for a population explosion among insects such as mosquitoes is tremendous. So far the impact this will have on agriculture is all speculation but the damage that could result from a substantial decrease in bats is great.

Bats reproduce slowly, generally only one offspring per year so the recovery time for the bat population would be very long. On top of the white nose syndrome about half the bat species in the world are already endangered due to habitat destruction and human pollution. Makes it questionable as to whether some bats will ever manage to recover at all. Sad.

Shh!

We sleeping.

Ick

I have the plague (a cold). I’m most certainly dying (coughing, sore throat). I haven’t slept in days (yeah, that’s true but it has little to do with this ailment) so I’m about to pass out from exhaustion (might doze off if I sit still too long). I should be hospitalized, under the care of specialists (spend the day relaxing, taking otc cold tabs). I can’t possibly work in this condition (should stay home mainly to keep my germs to myself but migraine season has two months to go so I won’t waste a sick day on this so steer clear or I’ll breathe on you).

I hate being sick in the summer. Too hot for a nice cup of tea and my cozy blanket. Therefore I refuse to do it. It’ll just have to go away until winter when you’re supposed to get sick. Damn cold.